Wednesday, November 21, 2012
Turkey Mike Donlin is thankful that he doesn't have to add your blood to the list of debaucherous stains on his gameday sweater, even though it would make a nice complement to the sticky brown of tobacco and the ever-fading patches of whiskey from benders past.
But if you snap a picture of him like that again, you may no longer possess a shutter-opening finger, if you know what Turkey Mike means. Nobody gives two craps about him the rest of the year even though he was a key part of the New York Giants' first World Series win in 1905, so stop with all the attention nowsabouts.
Instead, enjoy your Thanksgiving with some Sweetbreads to plump yourself up.